100 Years Old

I was at a funeral yesterday. It was a celebration of life of someone I wish I could have known better but knew well enough. She died one month shy of her 101st birthday. I've never known anyone who lived that long, can you imagine what that must be like? Lots of people like to mention how they would never want to live that long because of all of the people you lose along the way, but what about the things and people you do get to see as well? What about the history and experiences you can have? What about the loves and lives you can share, so many more than most people.

She was small in stature, with a tough as nails exterior and an organized mind like you would not believe yet a sweetness you could. Can you imagine all that she saw and did starting in 1911? So many things came and went in her life, good and bad, new and old.  Family came first to her of course and most important to her was that she was a wife, a mother of two, grandmother of five and great-grandmother of 6. She did cross-stitch, read several books a week, could recall details in her own and other people's lives half her age!  When I first met her she was 92 years old and frying a steak in a cast iron skillet in an apartment she lived in alone; only because her husband with whom she had been married to for 69 years had only recently passed away. She sent many cards for birthdays, holidays, and notes to say hello and how she was doing. She had her own way of doing things and saying things as well. She would laugh just as easily as she would tell you you were wrong about something and she would precisely lay out why. She took her time with things but she sure could tell a story that kept you rapt in the details and waiting for the punchline in that old Baltimore way.

We were planning a visit to see her this weekend, I hadn't seen her since her 99th birthday nearly two years ago. I couldn't be there for her 100th because of hurricane Irene...

I'm gonna miss her but can only feel a melancholy happiness. I'm glad  I am able to say I knew someone so wonderful who had seen so much, and I got to be a tiny little part of that.

counting on you, mystical spirits of the fate-o-sphere

This time around I'd really like if you could make things go my way...just saying...
This time around I think I'd really like to move on...
This time around I just want to say when the mood or force moves you, have it be positive to my future happiness...
This time around I can feel it!

Just Fucking Put It In There

Those of us with unclean minds might interpret that title wrongly. But it does leave itself open doesn't it? No, really I mean to vent my frustrations with someone I work with who doesn't understand what it means to work in a team environment.

I suggested an edit to a document that would clearly make it more succinct and understandable. Merely makes the document stand on its own and provides detail if someone were to question the specifics of a chemical that is being described.

But no, this newbie, pretending to know it all, decides that she "disagrees" and won't take my comment and will undermine my authority by doing so. I am the eco lead. Do as I say fuck nut. Just put the production volume information into the hazard characterization. Just cause it's a hazard characterization doesn't mean you can't have exposure information in it.

Just fucking do it, minion. Don't care how long you've been here as a contractor, as an employee you've only been here < 6 months. I didn't drag my ass to work everyday for nearly 4 years for you to undermine me. Just fucking put it in there, it's not a hardship asshole.

My teeth hurt

Got braces on the bottom yesterday to top off the full metal regalia I have on my top teeth. I can't shake the pain. I'm trying to brave through it but that's dumb. I should just go and take something for it but I won't. Maybe later.

What a pain!

Mystical Spirits of the Fate-o-Sphere

So I don't really believe in a higher being. I am spiritual and believe in worshiping the earth around us, every part of it except things humans have had a hand in. I firmly believe to respect every living thing as best we can. After all, chances are it was here waaaaaaay before we got here. I think alot of us fail to recognize how new we are to this place. It's hard to grasp that concept in human terms.

The one thing I strongly believe in is some higher force of nature that guides us along. To me they are spirits watching and hovering. Not good, not bad but take things as they come and deal them out as it happens. No force or influence to make things go one way or another for anyone. It just happens.

So when I find myself in a situation where I have done everything I can in my power to make my fate work for me, the only thing left is to speak to the mystical spirits of the fate-o-sphere and let them know I have done all I can and the rest is in their hands and can you please make it favorable for me this twist of fate? And if it does not, and if my requests go unanswered as they did last fall when the job of my dreams was whisked from my grasp because of budget constraints? Then I say fuck it all...who knows? I'll try again next time!

CBI LAN is down...

...perhaps we should all go into the server room and sing "for he's a jolly good fellow"!

huzzah!

3 times a charm of middle aged bitches

Ok, so I dunno what the f was going on a few weeks past but it seemed like every middle aged woman with a stick up her ass wanted to chew me out for no reason, and for some other twist of fate it happened to be international.

October 14: I am in Paris for work (so awesome, maybe another post about that when I get motivated) and I took a few days to see the sights and enjoy the fact that I was in Paris. I decided to check out the Paris Catacombs but that required navigating the metro. Which I put off bec. public transportation has certain nuances one can only get a handle on as a native. I don't like to be put in embarrassing situations so I like to avoid potential mishaps. Anyway, I get to the ticket counter and I am trying to read the regs for a day pass. it is hard to understand the "zones". Some crazy bitch comes up behind me with some wheely luggage and proceeds to yell at me in French so fast all I can understand is why are you standing there. In my promptness to reply, I tell her in English to go ahead of me. She looks at me like I have two heads. She then proceeds to bitch me out (I think) in French but luckily she is speaking way to fast for me to even remotely catch what she is saying. This unfortunately prompts the poor ticket booth guy to come out of his booth to ask me what is going on. I ask him if he speaks English and since he replies to me in French I proceed to tell him in French that I would like to buy a ticket but I do not understand the zones. He explains that to me and then I say yes I would like to purchase a day ticket so stay within Paris and travel the metro for any number of trips. I apologize profusely in French and he gestures not to worry about it because that woman was crazy...indeed!

Well that makes for a great story but that is only number 1. Number two happened at 6:30 am when I arrived at Dr. B*******'s to park my car as I have been doing for the past 2.5 years. I park my car in a space labeled "reserved" which are intended for visitors to people who do live in that apartment. In all of my 2.5 years doing this I have NEVER seen anyone that early at the apartment until October 17 when there is a woman doing Tai Chi on the lawn to the right side of the apartment. She proceeds to ask me if I live there. When I reply no she asks if I parked in a spot. I said I parked in a spot labeled reserved. She proceeds to be nasty and inquisition like to say how unfair that is for me to park there all day while at work and what is your name and what is your license plate number. I said that is not important. I am allowed to park there because the person who lives there who I see has allowed me to do so. If you want to take it up with her her name is J*** B*******. I said I see her in the afternoons and she asked my appointment time. I said 4:30...have a nice day and she said nothing back. WHAT in the world gives her the right to grill me like that at 6:30 am on a Monday morning? Bitch, clearly your Tai Chi is not doing the job because you need to find something better to do than that at 6:30 am! Fuck! I proceeded to walk to metro all flipped out because of thoughts of her trying to have my car towed. Luckily there was someone else parked in a spot labeled "reserved" so she would not be able to tell which car was mine. Who does that shit? christ on a corn dog!

Sweet number 3: Fast forward to that Friday October 21 (so I have come full circle; in one week a total of 3 middle-aged bitches chewed me out for no reason in that they, in my opinion, all needed to get laid). I am in Baltimore dropping off some financial papers at RBC for A. 100 Light Street. I find a parking garage nearby and it is a tight squeeze driving up the driveway in the garage to get the ticket. The hill at the ticket thingy is pretty steep (think Chinatown San Francisco) and I am parked a little off so I have to unbuckle my seat-belt. Bitch number 3 screams at me from her car "come on already!", so I proceed to yell out of my car, "give me a second!" She then proceeds to give me less than a millisecond and screams something else bitchy I can't remember so I yell "what the fuck is wrong with you?". I grab my ticket and proceed to take my sweet ass time trying to find a spot up on level 6. I find one and as she zooms passed me, I flip her the bird with emphasis. What an asshole! I felt like getting out of my car and punching her. At 10:30 am? Really? What is it with you bitches before noon on a weekday? What in your life is so hard that you had to decide to take shit out on me on two continents in the span of one week?

SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!