3 times a charm of middle aged bitches

Ok, so I dunno what the f was going on a few weeks past but it seemed like every middle aged woman with a stick up her ass wanted to chew me out for no reason, and for some other twist of fate it happened to be international.

October 14: I am in Paris for work (so awesome, maybe another post about that when I get motivated) and I took a few days to see the sights and enjoy the fact that I was in Paris. I decided to check out the Paris Catacombs but that required navigating the metro. Which I put off bec. public transportation has certain nuances one can only get a handle on as a native. I don't like to be put in embarrassing situations so I like to avoid potential mishaps. Anyway, I get to the ticket counter and I am trying to read the regs for a day pass. it is hard to understand the "zones". Some crazy bitch comes up behind me with some wheely luggage and proceeds to yell at me in French so fast all I can understand is why are you standing there. In my promptness to reply, I tell her in English to go ahead of me. She looks at me like I have two heads. She then proceeds to bitch me out (I think) in French but luckily she is speaking way to fast for me to even remotely catch what she is saying. This unfortunately prompts the poor ticket booth guy to come out of his booth to ask me what is going on. I ask him if he speaks English and since he replies to me in French I proceed to tell him in French that I would like to buy a ticket but I do not understand the zones. He explains that to me and then I say yes I would like to purchase a day ticket so stay within Paris and travel the metro for any number of trips. I apologize profusely in French and he gestures not to worry about it because that woman was crazy...indeed!

Well that makes for a great story but that is only number 1. Number two happened at 6:30 am when I arrived at Dr. B*******'s to park my car as I have been doing for the past 2.5 years. I park my car in a space labeled "reserved" which are intended for visitors to people who do live in that apartment. In all of my 2.5 years doing this I have NEVER seen anyone that early at the apartment until October 17 when there is a woman doing Tai Chi on the lawn to the right side of the apartment. She proceeds to ask me if I live there. When I reply no she asks if I parked in a spot. I said I parked in a spot labeled reserved. She proceeds to be nasty and inquisition like to say how unfair that is for me to park there all day while at work and what is your name and what is your license plate number. I said that is not important. I am allowed to park there because the person who lives there who I see has allowed me to do so. If you want to take it up with her her name is J*** B*******. I said I see her in the afternoons and she asked my appointment time. I said 4:30...have a nice day and she said nothing back. WHAT in the world gives her the right to grill me like that at 6:30 am on a Monday morning? Bitch, clearly your Tai Chi is not doing the job because you need to find something better to do than that at 6:30 am! Fuck! I proceeded to walk to metro all flipped out because of thoughts of her trying to have my car towed. Luckily there was someone else parked in a spot labeled "reserved" so she would not be able to tell which car was mine. Who does that shit? christ on a corn dog!

Sweet number 3: Fast forward to that Friday October 21 (so I have come full circle; in one week a total of 3 middle-aged bitches chewed me out for no reason in that they, in my opinion, all needed to get laid). I am in Baltimore dropping off some financial papers at RBC for A. 100 Light Street. I find a parking garage nearby and it is a tight squeeze driving up the driveway in the garage to get the ticket. The hill at the ticket thingy is pretty steep (think Chinatown San Francisco) and I am parked a little off so I have to unbuckle my seat-belt. Bitch number 3 screams at me from her car "come on already!", so I proceed to yell out of my car, "give me a second!" She then proceeds to give me less than a millisecond and screams something else bitchy I can't remember so I yell "what the fuck is wrong with you?". I grab my ticket and proceed to take my sweet ass time trying to find a spot up on level 6. I find one and as she zooms passed me, I flip her the bird with emphasis. What an asshole! I felt like getting out of my car and punching her. At 10:30 am? Really? What is it with you bitches before noon on a weekday? What in your life is so hard that you had to decide to take shit out on me on two continents in the span of one week?

SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE!